Well I just had to share with you all that I've lost 11 lbs since I started training w/ my Brother EV (AJ's husband & IV's dad!) I'm so excited. I have to admit that I've always struggled with my weight & part of my committing to the adoption, was that I refused to pass down my bad habits to a child who needs me to be the best mom that I can be. So I'm very proud of myself because I want to be the best parent that I can be and I'm working on it and seeing real results. It feels so good to see and feel things coming together.
Other highlights...
Adrienne - wrote a very touching blog that I really enjoyed reading! Oh and Owen is so cute & the developments are amazing! Great job to the new parents!
Nathan and Melissa are in court today for little I so keep them in your prayers!
Congrats to Becky and Keith who decided Kras was the place where their little peanut is waiting for them!
To Sira - Max is getting cuter and bigger with each and every post! I'm glad that he likes preschool!
On another note - I told one of my neighbors that I was thinking about adoption and she came down on me like a ton of bricks on how hard it was going to be & how I was way too young & how I had no idea how expensive it would be & that it was definitely something that she didn't think that I could handle on my own. I have to say that I was crushed by her reaction thinking that she'd be happy for me and she just really looked disappointed more than anything. I know I shouldn't think about this ... but would her reaction have been different if I was married & wanted a child? I guess I should prepare myself for more reactions like the one I got last night. It's just disheartening to know that there are people out there who would deny me adopting because of how hard it's going to be and all of the negatives vs. the positives that yes while it might be very hard & I might have to do more on my own - I would be making a difference in the life of a child who might not otherwise have a chance at a life with a real parent, a real home, a grandma & grandpa, an aunt, an uncle, a sweet cousin (IV) and two great grandmothers, a great grandfather and a loving family. Here is the other positive I have always wanted to be a parent. It's just something I've known that I was always meant to be. I think at this point I'm going to have to take the leap of faith and know that not everyone out there is going to be supportive and I'll just have to deal with it as it comes and roll with the punches.
To all the people who read my blog - Thanks for all your support it means so much to me.
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6 comments:
First of all, thank you so much for highlighting us in your blog post! :)
Second, don't you dare listen to a word anyone else says that is negative about your decision to adopt. You know it will be challenging, but you also know you have so much experience with children and you WANT a child! Not only will you be blessed but you will be blessing a child who will be given a new life by your love for her. MandyJo, I am so sorry this person tried to break your spirit. I have a friend who is married and wants to have a baby, and her best friend in the world (or so she thought) acted the same way about her decision to try to have a baby. She told her that her life was basically over and that she would not see her anymore if she had a baby and that she was too old, that she'd never get to go anywhere or do anything for herself ever again, etc. HOW RUDE!! This is a decision you are making for a very special reason. God gave you this desire, and you have to listen to Him and his calling, not anyone else's. Sorry to get on a soapbox, but this is one thing that has always gotten to me. You want to save the life of a child and you want to be a mother, and someone is going to tell you that you shouldn't?! We were told time and again all of the different problems a child adopted internationally could have, all the issues we'd have to deal with, etc. We always responded, our biological child could be the same or even worse, we don't know and don't really care!!
You just follow your heart and we are all here to support you along the way! It will be tough, but you have the WANT and the KNOW HOW and it's so worth it!
:) Big Hugs to You!,
Adrienne
Oh you'll get tons of rude and inconsiderate comments once you start telling people.
We got a lot of horror stories of other Russian adoptions; from everyone including my family when we first started. Mainly about health issues of the children.
But you've done your research. I think often people think you just woke up and said I'm going to adopt today. They don't understand the amount of preparing you do before you announce it to people.
And remember that most times the rude comments are because they just don't know. They are uneducated on adoption and that's not a negative statement just a fact. But it's great that we get to educate those willing to learn.
People who say things like this just don't understand the beauty in adoption. And unfortunately, they probably never will. I would just encourage you to shake off what she's told you...and live with the knowledge that when you return, you'll have the joy of showing her just how wrong she was! :)
Thanks for mentioning us on your blog! :-) MandyJo - you are just the sweetest and anyone can tell what a great parent you'd be. If you have it in your heart and your mind than that is all that matters. I second EVERYTHING Adrienne says. We all need to have thick skin during this process. My boss said to me "Can I ask you WHY?" I said "Why what?" He said "Why do you want to ruin your life? You can do everything you want to do - travel, sleep, etc... why would you ever want to change that?" Ugggggghhhhh... What an idiot is all I can say! :-) Be strong and just do what's in your heart. Hope you're having a great weekend!
Amen Adrienne! What she said!!! Adrienne and I had this discussion in Russia while we were there together- comparing war stories of the comments we got from people.
Amanda I will have to let you in on something- once you decide this is the path for you people come out of the wood work with the rude comments. Welcome to our club! The most surprising (for me) was that some of these things came from the people that you would never expect it from.
I can tell you from a adoptive mother's prespective that it is the BEST thing that I have ever done nothing else can compare to the love that has blessed me.
I also understand the looks you may get as being a single. I am not married but I am in a loving relationship with Cliff and we have been together for 8 years. Yes we felt that it was not the most important thing to be married before we brought our son home. Many people voiced their opinons on that as well. We felt the most important thing was to get our son out of the orphanage and into our home asap! The "paper" that will bond us together can wait. Again this was our decision for our family. People will always tell you that your decisions are wrong and indifferent but it is YOUR family and you need to make the right decisions for your family not the one down the street or next door. I wish people would just understand this.
Well you have our support and prayers. Congradulations on the 11 lbs- That is an exta boost!
Congrats on losing 11 pounds!! Troy and I have been walking and such because I feel much like you do. And like everyone else, don't listen to anyone but you!! I have seen different reactions. Some people are so interested and then you can tell the ones that aren't. I actually had a lady who had been adopted say that she knew what it felt like to be taken in to a home and she was do happy for us. It felt so good to hear that from someone.
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