Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Tag I'm It....

Tag, I'm it!
This is the 4 things tag! Thanks April (http://vietnambabygirlsmith.blogspot.com/) for letting me join in the fun!

4 jobs I've had:

1. Nanny
2. Wendy's Cashier/worker (be kind to fast food workers it's a sad job!)
3. Customer Service Manager (DFI)
4. Property Manager & Project Manager (Construction)

4 movies watched over and over:

1. National Treasure
2. National Treasure 2 Book of Secrets
3. Pirates of the Caribbean 1-3
4. Footloose

4 places I've lived:

1. Palestine, Ohio
2. Monticello/Buffalo, MN
3. Edina, MN
4. Cincinnati, Ohio & Bemdji, MN

4 shows I watch:

1. CSI
2. SuperNanny
3. The Biggest Loser
4. Sponge Bob Square Pants

4 places I've been:

1. Bahamas
2. The Black Hills, South Dakota
3. Washington D.C.
4. Boston, MA

4 people who e-mail me regularly:

1. Alyssa my sister
2. Patti - lady I nanny for
3. my bosses
4. vendors

4 favorite things to eat:

1. Raspberries - fresh
2. Peanut Butter & Banana Protein Smoothies
3. Salmon
4. Celery Peanut butter and raisens


4 places I'd rather be:

1. Being a stay at home wife and mother - I know I'm dreaming!
2. on the beach somewhere with my family!
3. Going 4 wheeling up North or in South Dakota
4. Starting on my adoption or picking up my child in Russia!

4 things I look forward to this year:

1. starting my adoption - possibly!
2. losing those last 30 pounds - I'm down a total of 70 as of today!
3. Paying off my debt
4. Getting a Toyota Prius so that I can spend less on gas vs my truck that gets 17.5 mpg!

4 people to tag:
1. Rachel http://journeywiththewilliamsfamily.blogspot.com/
2. Becky http://russianpeanut.blogspot.com/
3. Carrie http://www.oneal-itsasmallworld.blogspot.com/
4. Brandy http://ginsbergsrussianadoption.blogspot.com/

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Questions about my adoption...

This blog posted started out as a response to a comment posted on my blog.... but then I felt like it kind of turned into a post so I ended up posting it instead I hope that you all don't mind. Blessings to you all.... my best wishes for you all. Please read.

I am still hoping to adopt and I haven't forgot about my adoption, but God's hand is moving in my life in so many ways. I just started a new job and I honestly don't believe it's financially responsible to start an adoption with as much debt as I'm in and the fact that I'm creating a single income family. So what I'm doing is trying to excel at my new job, work hard, they are going to send me back to school, so that I have more earning potential and yes I'm waiting on my adoption to see how the new job shakes out. I have to wait for God's timing as well as my own and yes my weight loss is a big focus right now, but everyone prepares for life changes in a different way. I have no idea where the road that God has me on is going to lead me. For all I know maybe I'm getting healthy so that I can meet the man of my dreams and we can adopt together or maybe I've been blessed w/ this new job so that I can afford to adopt on my own. I just don't know where it's leading me. Don't worry that I'm not focusing on my adoption it is in the back of my mind at all times but when you are single sometimes you have to look at the big picture and the financial key is a big thing. I don't feel that God would send me in the wrong direction. I think maybe having faith and trust is something that I just have to believe in. I know that my adoption will happen when the time is right for me. God's plan never fails. I was a miracle baby who made it through so many trials and tribulations and I've always known he has a special plan for me. As for the fact that I've been focusing on my weigh loss, I don't feel like this is a bad thing. It's taught me to work hard to persevere through hard times, to wait and be patient. To see the small changes in myself, to be aware of myself, and to really see in my life the people who are there supporting me and also to learn the tough lessons of those who are only there to support you when it's best for them. Let me say I've learned some hard lessons through this weight loss. I've learned the importance of acceptance of not only myself and my shortcomings, but what I can deal with from others who I thought were my friends. I've learned that my family is one of the greatest blessings that I could have asked for but never really knew how much they truly loved me until I stepped back and started working on loving myself. So I want to say I know that my blog has changed in the past year, but I don't think that is a bad thing. I think everyone evolves in one way or another. I haven't given up my goal of adoption even if I lose all my weight, or find the man of my dreams, or stay single - I still want to be an adoptive parent.
Thanks for listening ..... you're all always in my prayers.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Picture from Christmas



Okay so with starting this new job - this week I haven't had much of a chance to post as many pictures as I would like - but here is one of my favorite ones from Christmas 2007. It's IV and I on Christmas Day after she opened the piano that I gave her. When I saw this picture for the first time it was really hard for me to believe that the girl in the picture is me - I mean as of today - I've lost a total of 69 pounds. I sometimes feel like I'm discovering myself all over again when I see pictures of me. Change in my life is one of those amazing things that it's hard to believe it if you don't see it and I'm actually starting to see the changes especially when I look back at other pictures that I've been in from months ago or even last year at this time. I love taking pictures now even more and when I say I love taking pictures I mean I love being in the pictures. Which when I was thinking about it is going to be a great thing when I get to my adoption. I mean I know how everyone loves to take pictures of new babies, but I think it's so special when you can see the bond between the subjects in a photograph. For example - I'll post some of me and my best friend T.K. you can see a glimpse into our relationship when you see the pictures of the two of us. It really just is an wonderful thing. Here are two of the pictures:


So I hope that everyone is having a great new year so far... I just want you all to know that I've been thinking about and praying for all of you especially the ones that are waiting for referrals and/or waiting to go pick up their little one! Best wishes ... MJ

Saturday, January 12, 2008

New Years 2008

Well this year .... on New Year's Eve - I went out to dinner with a friend. We had a great dinner. Then we went to a double feature movie. The Water Horse, a children's movie, but I really enjoyed it. I think that it would be a great movie for children to see with their parents. Then after we saw The Water Horse - we went to National Treasure Book of Secrets. Yes if you've read my previous posts I did see it before with my family, but honestly it's one that I know that I'll be watching over and over again. History really interests me. Also part of the movie is set in South Dakota, The Black Hills and that is where I went for vacation last year and I'm going back again this year. So that was something that I enjoyed seeing! The next morning I slept in and worked out just had a low key day. I hung out with a different friend on New Years day evening! It was nice and relaxing! I still need to work on getting my Christmas stuff put away this weekend! Is anyone else struggling to get their Christmas decorations put away? I just feel like lately I'm just never home to get anything done! I look forward to the time when I have children so that I'll have a reason to be home all the time. My sister and I were talking about the fact that I can't wait to be a parent, but AJ, EV, and my best friend TK think that since I'm happier than I've ever been before that they are sure that this is my year to meet Mr. Right, fall in love, and get married. Hmmmm... I guess I feel like I've been blessed in my life so much at this point if that were to happen, I'd be excited, however if it doesn't I know that I am blessed and I have friends and family who care about me very very much. I had no idea that my life would change as much as it has in the past 6 months; and I'm excited to imagine and await every day to see what's going to happen next in this wonderful adventure we call life.

Friday, January 11, 2008

A New Job & a New Start for 2008

Whew .... I've waited for quite a while to post about my new job. Today was my last day at the office. For all of you that didn't know I worked for a small company doing customer service, sales and marketing. I worked with my Dad, my sister, and I got to see IV every single day. I never disliked my job, I enjoyed my boss, my fellow employees, and my clients; but I never felt like I was very good at sales. Sales wasn't something that I wanted to do it, kind of fell in my lap and I tried my best to make it happen. I'd been praying since around this time last year for God to show me what path I should be taking and if I was suppose to be doing sales could he make it work, so I'd bring in profits for the company and if it was not suppose to work then God please show me what I should be doing instead. So I kept praying and praying and on the second week of December 2007. I caught wind of a position that was open for property management and administration/project management for a construction company. What's even better - they wanted me for the position! I'm went to interview, and I clicked with everyone there! I had a good discussion about what their goals were and what my goals were and what the job would entail. So after much thought I decided to accept the new position. That was December 14th. I told my Dad that same day. I was very nervous, but it went alright and I know that my Dad understands that this is what is best for me. I'm going to be driving a little bit further to work approx. 10 more miles, but I got my 3 weeks of vacation. What's even better is that I'll be going back to school!! For me that is wonderful because I've always wanted to finish school, but I've always struggled with money and not been able to make it happen. Now I'm going to be going back to school for my new employer. I feel like my prayers have been answered. I prayed to God for him to show me a path and he has done just that! I think that I will be able to start my adoption process as long as this position works out for me! I'm so excited about this because it's the change that I've been waiting for. I feel a little bit sad because I know that I need to wait to make sure this new job works out, which I know is upsetting for my mom, because she thought that I would be applying for my adoption as soon as I started this new position. It's just that since I'm single I want to make sure that I can provide for a child financially before I go ahead and start a process that I don't know if I can finish. I'm also wondering how it will work with a full time job and going to school at the same time. I want to say thanks to all of you who've prayed for me, because I really do feel like this job was an answer to my prayers and al the people who've had me in their prayers.

Weight Loss Update for January 11th, 2008

So I'm sure you folks are wondering where I'm at with my weight loss. Six months ago today, I decided I wanted to change my life and not just change my life but to be a healthier person. My aim to be a healthier person was motivated by so many things.
I think that I'd like to list a few of them.

1. I wanted to be the best parent that I could possibly be - since I was thinking I would be a single parent.
2. I wanted to be able to run
3. I wanted to be a better hockey player.
4. I wanted to feel beautiful in my own skin.
5. I wanted to be someone that IV, my niece could look up too.
6. I was inspired by my sister and the way she had/has lost her baby weight from being pregnant with IV.
7. I wanted to feel sexy.
8. I wanted to see if I could make the healthy changes.
9. I wanted to be better on my wheeler.

My weight loss wasn't something that I decided on a whim, I'd thought and thought about the things that I wanted for myself and even thought about the things that I wanted for my future family. It was something that I thought that I owed it to myself to work on even if I wasn't sure I could make it? Over the past 6 months ... (yup I started on July 11th, 2007) I have started over with myself and kind of given up control of what my head tells me is best and letting EV (my trainer) tell me what I should be doing. Should I be eating this or training here - I let him guide me. I have never felt so proud of myself and so comfortable in my own skin in my whole life. I have gone through my closet and gotten rid of clothes a couple times and one of those times I tried on my prom dress from my senior high school prom which I went to alone because I didn't have a date and you know what my prom dress was too big for me. That felt incredible. A real accomplishment something that I worked for and stuck with and I did it, for myself. I'm one of those people who never does for myself. I am always doing for others and putting myself last. After six months do I still make some mistakes and struggle to eat right? Somedays are harder than others, but I really feel like I'm not scared to keep working towards my goals. Today is a special day for a couple of reasons. I've made it through six months of training, I have lost a total of 66 pounds, and I'm under 200 pounds, which is something I never thought would happen. I really want people to know that if you put your mind to a goal you can do it. I know that I couldn't have done it with out the support of my trainer EV, my sister, and my family and a great group of friends who are all so supportive. I know that I'd like to lose atleast 39 to 50 more pounds. I've enjoyed seeing my body, face, and looks change and it's funny when people don't recognize me or when my dentist asked me if I got gastric bypass surgery. I've inspired people to eat healthier, workout, and make healthy changes in their lives and that is something I never thought I could have done. The Lord has blessed me and in turn my blessings are inspiring and blessing others and that is the greatest gift I could give myself or someone else.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

IV's Birthday Celebration

So when you have a neice and she is so sweet like IV - you just want to talk - which here means BRAG about her all the time! IV has been such a blessing for so many reasons. She makes me smile, laugh, look at life with brand new eyes. Her first birthday was wonderful. My Grandma Runner came up to visit for IV's birthday; she got in on a Wednesday night and then stayed until the following Tuesday morning. My sister had some vacation time and took a few days off so that my sister AJ & baby IV - could get in some quality time with Great Grandma! Then on Saturday we had IV's birthday party. She had two cakes. Lots of people at her party. Family, Friends and another little boy who was so cute. IV really got the hang of ripping the paper off of packages. She got a tricycle from EV and AJ. Mom and Dad got her a little grocery cart. She got lots of books and toys. I got her a little vacuum cleaner that sings & teaches the alphabet. I also got her a cute little winter outfit w/ cute sweater and brown cord pants. It was great to be able to spend some time with my family.
During the past few weekends, I've had so much time with my wonderful family. We had some good talks, we played some cards, watched National Treasure Book of Secrets-even IV went to the movie. She slept most of the way through. Her smart mommy planned the family going to the movie during her nap time. I would recommend the movie to any of you that need an idea for a date night. National Treasure the original was a great movie, but the second one was just as good. If you don't check it out on the big screen, make sure you check it out on DVD. My dad and I went Christmas shopping on Christmas eve for my mom, which is always fun - even though the roads weren't the greatest. Much to the rest of my family's dismay Dad and I took so long shopping for mom we didn't get home in time to make it to Christmas eve service at Church. :( It was good to spend time with my Dad though and just having time to talk to him.

I wanted to let you all know that I have pictures that I'd like to add to these blogs, but what has happened is - I was so busy with work at DFI - that I didn't get a chance to write my blogs and update you all on everything over the last week I was at work. I ended up taking my computer home (with all my pictures on it) home yesterday! I am going to work on getting internet at my house, but as of right now I don't have it at my house so I'm posting from a computer at the family I nanny for. I have some great pictures from IV's birthday and I think that right now I'm only missing one post and that one would be for Christmas... hope you all had a great Holiday! I've enjoyed reading all about you guys! Pictures to come.... MJ